I flipped through luxurious bridal magazines thicker than telephone directories looking for pictures of brides with their hair free of bobby pins. I came up empty.

 

“You want your hair to look special on your wedding day, don’t you?” said the hairstylist during a trial-run appointment. I caved. “Sure. Give me an up-do.” An hour and a half later the woman staring back in the mirror was no longer me. She wasn’t the kind of girl who wore plaid flannel pajamas. She didn’t have hangnails or enjoy frothy Guinness and warm slabs of steak. That girl wore satin. She ordered salad for lunch. She chewed slowly. She got manicures.

 

I dismantled the up-do as soon as I got into my car. That evening was one of clarity: I was going to be myself no matter how much pressure I felt. Thankfully, that pressure didn’t come from family or friends. All along, they encouraged me to be true to myself. They knew that I was the type of gal that marched to her own beat. Why would I suddenly change all that on my wedding day?

 

I had been to enough weddings to know what I didn’t want at our wedding, which included: A)A mile-long receiving line B) Drunk people doing ‘The Macarena’ c) $400 cake smashed into my face D)People singing silly rhyming songs to get us to kiss.

 

I bought a book to help me plan our wedding, but the more I read, the more I realized just how much my version of the ideal wedding differed from the norm. I didn’t want five bridesmaids; one maid of honor suited me just fine. I didn’t want a garter toss. I didn’t want a DJ playing the Electric Slide. Sure, I wanted music, but my music would be live. And most of all, I didn’t want a big, fat guest list. I didn’t want to celebrate my wedding day with a group of strangers. Instead, I wanted everyone there to have touched our lives in a special way.

 

I shake my head when I think of all the things I fretted over while we were planning our wedding. Can we really have a wedding with no bridesmaids or groomsmen? What will they think of us? Will people think it’s weird that we don’t have a receiving line? Will our guests still have fun if there is no dancing?

 

I want other brides to feel confident in their decision to have a small wedding – even if their ideas buck convention. I want couples to feel a sense of validation, and, of course, I want them to hear about all the wonderful things a small wedding can offer them.

 

I don’t have a single regret about taking the aisle less traveled. For me, it has made all the difference.