Amanda, 24 & Ben, 26

Wedding Date: August 31, 2008

Number of Guests: 52

Wedding Ceremony Location: Family cottage, Lakeside Fairholm Island, Lake Muskoka, Ontario, Canada.

Wedding Reception Location: Family cottage, also on Fairholm Island, Lake Muskoka, Ontario, Canada.

Why did you have an intimate wedding?

Before the wedding, I thought it was because of the budget and the size limitation of the venue. Looking back, though, the connection with our guests should have been the biggest reason. Even if money and space hadn’t been an issue, I wouldn’t have done it any other way.

What are some the challenges that you faced planning an intimate wedding?

Most of the challenges were related to the fact that we were using a non-traditional venue. The cottage {it’s been in the bride’s mother’s family for more than 100 years!} just wasn’t set up for a large party. Also, it’s on an island, so everything (food, chairs, tables, dishes, staff, guests, decorations, and a rather large grill) had to be brought in by boat, which was no small task.

Was it difficult to pare down the guest list?

Yes and no. Yes, because of course there are people we would have liked to invite and couldn’t. But also no, because we were having a destination wedding (we live in Pennsylvania), so there were people who just would not have been able to make it.

Did you have any ‘issues’ with the small guest list from friends and family? If so, how did you address them?

Actually, we didn’t have many problems at all. We explained to our relatives early on in the planning process what guidelines we had set out – close friends and family only. Nobody really seemed to have a problem with our approach.

What were the highlights of the ceremony?

Ben’s vows. We had decided to write our own, and he absolutely blew me away. That, and the reaction of my youngest sister, who was one of my bridesmaids. She was apparently so overcome with emotion that she cried through the whole ceremony. Happy tears, though! Towards the end of the ceremony my father had to throw her a pack of tissues. Our videographer caught that moment on tape and it cracks me up.

What were the highlights of the reception?

A few things come to mind. Ben was intent on picking our first dance song and keeping it a secret. He surprised me with a compilation of ‘Over the Rainbow’ by Israel Kamakawiwo’ole and ‘Grow Old With You’ by Adam Sandler, from the movie ‘The Wedding Singer.’ It was sweet, silly, and perfect.

We used an mp3 player for the reception, and unfortunately had some technical difficulties when it came time for the father daughter dance. I was heartbroken that ‘Little Miss Magic’ by Jimmy Buffet refused to play. My twin sister came to the rescue as impromptu DJ and selected – of all things – ‘Sweet Emotion’ by Aerosmith. We ended up ad libbing and doing the mashed potato and the sprinkler instead of something more traditional. It was a great spontaneous and funny moment.

My favorite part of the reception, though, was the speeches. In addition to the usual best man and maid of honor speech, the microphone was passed around the room to many of our guests, who had touching stories and advice to share.

What was the best thing about having an intimate wedding?

Being able to spend quality time with our closest friends and family, without running around and missing the chance to savor the occasion. It was amazing to have so many important people in our lives together in one place. We had everyone over the night before the wedding for a rehearsal dinner barbeque, where my grandfather gave a moving speech welcoming everyone to the island. Everyone got to meet and spend some time together before the wedding. Between the rehearsal dinner and the reception, I tried to spend as much time as possible with everyone, and I still could have used more time. I have no idea how people get to see anyone at large weddings!

What advice do you have for couples who are considering an intimate wedding?

You might get some flack for not inviting everyone you’ve ever met (and maybe some you haven’t met), but you won’t regret it. I know I don’t. That’s not to say that large celebrations are bad — if you want to have a huge wedding, go for it! Only you will know what kind of wedding you really want to have. Don’t let yourself get talked into inviting half the world if that’s not what you want.

Vendors:

Photographer: Photography by Stacey

Videographer: Starshine Videography

Catering: Dempsey Fine Catering

Muskoka Party Rentals

All Seasons Weddings

Photos: Photography by Stacey

Read more about this fantastic wedding over at dellastella.

I am so glad that the rules have changed about wedding attendants. You can have five bridesmaids. You can have one. You can have no bridesmaids. You can have male friends stand up for you. Your dog. Your cat. Your guinea pig. And it’s all okay – no matter what the size of your wedding.

I had a maid of honor and no bridesmaids. I cannot relate to the drama that oftentimes surrounds bridesmaids. To get a better understanding of this topic, I read Siri Agrell’s Bad Bridesmaid: Bachelorette Brawls and Taffeta Tantrums–Tales from the Front Lines.

Bad Bridesmaid: Bachelorette Brawls and Taffeta Tantrums–Tales from the Front Lines gives an inside glimpse into the mind of a bridesmaid. How does she feel about all of those obligatory bridesmaid outings? What does she really think when she hears you obsess over napkins, pew bows and cake toppers? How does she feel when she walks down the aisle in a dress that’s too tight, too sweaty and really not her colour?

Sound interesting? Check out my book review of Bad Bridesmaid over here.

What happens when  a library assistant and a librarian get married? They have a library themed wedding! I thought the diy invitiations that Scott and Diana made were fabulous. They ordered library slips from a library supply company, and used card stock, rubber stamps, a paper cutter and Microsoft Word to create them.

They had several library related items at their wedding reception. Each table was named after a favorite author of the bride and groom; each also had a book by the author, a framed picture of the writer, and a library card with the writer’s picture on it; every seat also had a book-themed crossword puzzle.

Instead of having a guest book,  guests wrote messages on small pieces of paper that were placed inside due date slips, and put inside a small suitcase. Love it!

See more photos from this library themed wedding here.

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I’m always on the look out for unique DIY wedding favors – especially consumable ones. I was searching around for Easter crafts today and stumbled on these cookie ornaments at Country Living. Crafter and baker Stacey Damurjian created them with the help of a local bakery, which copied the designs and patterns onto edible paper. Wouldn’t these make sweet DIY wedding favors? Go to Country Living for full instructions.

Happy Easter everyone!

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Does the thought of writing a speech for your husband-to-be make you panic? Why not hire someone else to write it? I read an interesting article in Maclean’s about the growing number of wedding speech writers.   Brides use ’em.  Grooms use ’em. So do the moms, dads and wedding parties.

Another article in the Globe and Mail discusses the growing demand for wedding speech writers. Judging by the readers’ comments it looks like some people have a problem with it. They think it takes away from the sincerity of the speech. I think they have a point, however speechwriting can be a serious source of distress for some people. Not everyone is a wordsmith. Just like not everyone can bake and decorate a wedding cake. Or take dazzling wedding photos. That’s why we hire professionals.

I don’t think there is anything wrong with enlisting a professional to help you organize your thoughts and present them  in an articulate and entertaining fashion.  My only advice would be to make sure you find a writer whose style you enjoy. Read previous speeches and ask for references.

If I had the time I could really dig being a speechwriter. Now, if only one could hire someone to GIVE the speech.Save